Taking things (or people) for granted

It is 2.18am as I am typing this. I'm in the hospital now, accompanying my sleeping mum. She hasn't been home for more than a month now.


I have never mentioned about this, but this is affecting me & my family a lot. She underwent an operation on the 5th day of CNY, which is already quite some time ago. It was supposedly a small & common operation & she could be discharged on the 4th day. But due to complications, the fucked-up doctors at NUH & the negligence of the nurses, my mum went through unnecessary trauma which could be avoided.



Just imagine, her heart rate was unusually high for 2 whole days (at 144) & they did nothing to help or try to find out the reason? She was panting 24/7 for 2 days & her stomach was bloated like 5-mth pregnant & no checks or x-rays were summoned.


2 days later we could stand it no more & demanded they do an x-ray. We had to wait an hour for an x-ray, & another hour for the report, because "there's only 1 person running the whole x-ray department"? The nurses even said that no specialists were on duty when my mum's in pain because "It is a Saturday."
WHAT THE HELL?



And mind you, she stayed at a Class A deluxe room. Is this the kind of care you give your patients? Class A, my foot! The doctor at Mt A thought she stayed at 8-bedded Class C or something when we told him her experience there. (Disclaimer: I'm not saying NUH is bad, this is just our experience. Might not be the same for all)


Shall not elaborate more, but we were so furious over their hack-care attitude that we insisted on transferring her over to Mount Alvernia, where she received immediate and personal care. Luckily we did not heed the advise of the doctor at NUH to "wait patiently", else she'd have died. She was found to have water retention in her lungs, which is very serious & can lead to death. One accident in the 1st op, led to her having 3 other repair op, all in a month. It is so heartbreaking to see her in pain.



During this 1 month, I realised we've all been so dependent on mum. My dad, my sis & I. Without her, I have to take up her load, all while having my major exams. It was so stressful for me. I have to open dozens of letters, pay the phone/electric/credit card bills, transfer money between accounts, fax documents to people, having to deal with hospital administration/insurance, going to banks every other day, visit mum everyday... It was all too much & too unfamiliar to me. The worst part was during my exam week when I realised I had little time left to study.



I know it is tough on dad too, cos he used to rely on her on financial stuffs. Ask her if rents are in, ask her to transfer between current & savings acc, ask her to write a cheque etc etc. And he doesn't have to worry about paying bills at all. Now he sometimes try to lighten the load by opening letters himself although he can't read english.



I guess this is the perfect example of how we always take people for granted. What do we all do when she is around? I don't know about Dad, but I do know my sis & I trouble her with the slightest stuff...

1. Sms-ing to remind her to transfer my allowance to my account

2. Calling to remind her to collect my clothes from the tailor beside her shop

3. Asking her to buy fresh milk & tidbits (& getting angry when she forgets)

4. Asking her to book nails/hair/facial appts for us cos we're lazy to call

5. Asking her to bring us to breakfast/shopping on a Saturday 

6. Reminding her to call the technician up when something is faulty at home (SCV, doorbell, basin, computer, fish pond, lightings... tons of things she needs to handle)

God I'm getting a little emotional here already My mum not only looks after things around the house & the finance, I just realised that there's so many other things she did single-handedly. Things like the dog's grooming, insurance for the whole family, lots of miscellaneous items.... at the same time helping my dad with his business (3pm-10pm everyday) & properties.



While all these already proves to be a big feat, she can still maintain looking youthful & squeeze in whatever minimal time she has for facials & stuffs like that. I'm already breaking down doing a fraction of what she normally does. I can't be certain I'll be more independent, but I'm sure this had me matured. She is a good person, please let her recover soon.



My mum, she is the one maintaining the family harmony.
My mum,

             she is the BEST mum ever